1. At
Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair
Dryer At Passing Cars.
See
If They Slow Down.

2. Page
Yourself Over The Intercom. Don’t
Disguise Your Voice.

3.
Every
Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.

4.
Put
Your Garbage Can On
Your Desk And Label It ‘In.’

5.
Put
Decaf In The Coffee
Maker For 3 Weeks
.
Once Everyone
has Gotten Over Their Caffeine
Addictions, Switch
to Espresso.

6.
In
The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write ‘
For
Smuggling
Diamonds’

7.
Finish
All Your sentences with
‘In
Accordance With The Prophecy.’

8.
Don’t
use any punctuation

9.
As
Often As Possible, Skip
Rather
Than Walk.

10.
Order
a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with
a serious face.

11.
Specify
That Your Drive-through Order Is’To
Go.’

12. Sing
Along At The Opera.

13.
Go
To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why
The Poems Don’t Rhyme?

14.
Put
Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And
Play
tropical Sounds All Day.

15.
Five
Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can’t Attend Their Party Because
You’re Not
In The Mood.

16.
Have
Your Co-workers Address You By Your
Wrestling Name, Rock
Bottom.

17.
When
The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream ‘I
Won!,
I Won!’

18.
When
Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The
Parking lot, Yelling ‘Run
For Your Lives,
They’re
Loose!!’

19.
Tell
Your Children Over Dinner.
‘Due
To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.’

20.
And
The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of
Insanity…….

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